Blog entry #7

The Division of Domestic Labor in Lesbigay Family
Many lesbian women express their concern that they do not do enough domestic work around the house. One of the lesbian couples interviewed expressed that they still take on certain gender roles, one being more gender neutral and another with a more feminine side. They also bring to the domestic realm certain things associated with the gender they take upon. As many wives of straight men express, a gay man also expressed the wish to be more appreciated for their domestic contributions to the household, and the reluctance their partners have towards doing domestic chores. Another man expressed that since he bought the house, he feels his partner should be responsible for upkeep. Roughly 25% of the homosexual couples interviewed were found to share the domestic tasks equally (Carrington). Of the middle and upper class couples interviewed, many outsourced and paid for domestic tasks. The domestic workers were mostly of a minority race and paid low rates (Carrington).
Many of the couples interviewed, both male and female, worked in traditionally female jobs. These jobs are more accommodating to family life. Also, the lack of children for many couples or few children allow for more time for oneself. However, still in homosexual couples 75% report that one partner is seen as responsible for the domestic duties (Carrington). Usually, this partner is the one with the lower paying job and less opportunity for economic advancement. One woman expressed her happiness after she left her 60 hour a week job for a true full time, 40 hour a week position, because she was able to work with her partner on domestic chores and had time to learn how to take care of a home and nurture a relationship.
Partners who forgo traditional careers to stay at home find other things to occupy their time with, especially because not many have children. One man interviewed used the skills he got from his career to volunteer instead, so he could have more time at home. Other times, partners do not make the choice to stay at home but simply do not have a chance for job advancement, and spend more time at home. Some people interviewed that they do feel discriminated against at their jobs because of their sexual orientation, especially the jobs at the more traditional, larger corporations.
Just like with heterosexual couples, the couples interviewed usually had to make compromises in the workplace to keep their home and domestic life alive. Also, some interviewed expressed the workplace as a sanctuary and place to relax, away from the demands of family life.

Doing Housework: Feeding and Family Life
This study was based on interviews of 30 urban families. Most women do not describe domestic work as the work they did in an office (Gerstel and Gross). Some describe doing domestic chores as love, while others describe it as obligatory. Especially for meal preparation, mothers see it as very important because meals are often the only time their whole family is together. Still, women must fit these meals around their husband and children’s schedules. Women also spend a large amount of time planning their mealtime, fitting the food to each individual’s preferences. Meals must also be healthy, since parents do not always see what their children eat at school. Food can also be a way of teaching culture and history to children.
Conversation is also important during meal times. Mothers try to get their children to discuss their days or things going on by dedicating this specific time to talk. This is also a time to learn manners and polite conversation, so that children are prepared to have meals in public. Not surprisingly, single mothers arrange less meals than married women do. Perhaps simply because they are not around during mealtime, or if they are they are too exhausted from their workday (Gerstel and Gross).
Many people do not view feeding as work. Since it is essential to life, there is no choice to do it or not. However, many mothers go above and beyond simply feeding their families at mealtime. Considering health, the family’s schedule, and preferences, are all things that go into planning a meal.

Autonomy, Dependence, or Display?
This study examines effects on women’s housework. The author argues that it is not how much their husband’s earn that influences women’s housework, but their own earnings. The economic exchange theory asserts that whichever partner earns less money makes up for this by spending more time on housework. However, the researcher proposes an alternate hypothesis, as described earlier. In terms of childcare, one previous researcher found the more women earn, the more likely they are to outsource childcare. Men’s earnings, however, do not have as much of an effect on domestic and childcare duties- this is the hypothesis the researcher proposes. The researcher looked at correlations between women’s hours working in the home and their earnings, as well as their partner’s. The research somewhat supported the hypothesis, that as women’s earnings increase, their time spent on domestic tasks decreases. Ironically, hours spent at work are not associated with time spent on domestic chores, for the husband nor wife. Since husband’s earnings have no impact on time spent at home, these findings might be in support of the economic exchange theory, high earning women do not feel the need to contribute as much a home. It could also mean that they can afford to outsource domestic duties.

Joey’s Problem
This chapter is about a 4-year old boy, Joey, and how his parents raise him and work full time jobs. The wife, Nancy, expresses her desire for a true egalitarian marriage, but that still takes work. Evan and Nancy’s marriage is also complicated because their son cannot fall asleep until about midnight, and Nancy has to take care of most of the bedtime activities. This is reflective of their life in general, because Joey is always expressing a preference for his mother. Evan, however, does not see this as a problem, playing the type of the strong and silent father. While Nancy works with Joey, Evan is busy doing his own thing downstairs, making it so that they have little time together at night after work without Joey.
Even though Nancy and Evan try to have an egalitarian marriage, it is far from it. The researcher found Nancy is responsible for 80% of housework and 90% of childcare (Hochschild). Even their son Joey echoed those sentiments, saying his mom does the housework. Nancy tried making schedules for household tasks, but Evan did not follow them. As Nancy tried to remind Evan, he got upset and did not do the tasks, and with Nancy refusing to do them as well, the household fell apart. Nancy does desire to do housework, but she also wants Evan to desire to help out as well, and both to appreciate each other for what they bring to their careers and their homes. Evan, however, did not understand why her choice to have a career meant he needed to be more domestically involved. Neither of them wanted to cut back to part-time work, even though Evan asked Nancy. When these problems became unbearable, Nancy succeeded and gave into being more domestically involved. They tried to split tasks half and half, but to no avail. Evan expressed his dislike for chores, and Nancy accepted them. Evan picked a few things to help out with around the house, as “token” second shift work, so he still felt he was contributing, which many men do (Hochschild). Nancy cited “fairness” as an important component to love and marriage, while Evan did not. Men often compare themselves to other husbands, thinking they do more than Husband X does, so their wives should be satisfied with their contributions. Men look around and decide on how much they domestic work they will do as according to others. This perpetuates the gender division within the home. Nancy, however, did not view this as fair, but gave up on the notion of fairness citing the existence of her marriage was more important. Both partners settled and compromised for their marriage, but Nancy did a lot more than Evan.